Take 100% RESPONSIBILTY!

Most people are not used to connecting with "positive" especially with this type of thing. That's ok...we are going to change that. I was the same way...used to get pretty ticked at every program or person that ONLY spoke about the positive reunions and such and not acknowledging the downside. There's a definite line and we're in the midst of understanding it and changing how everyone approaches this and what perspective they choose to hold. The "easy" way is to stay in denial, fear and anger...it worked for me for a long time too (well, didn't really work but that's what I thought at the time).

The concept here is to not denounce the negative but to be aware of it, work through it, get help with it and not be attached to it. Be indifferent to it. And hopefully as we change the system we will prevent the next age of adoptees from having to go through what we have thus far...to get them help early...and work towards more openness overall. I've read some great stories of those involved with Open Adoption...though I'm sure there are bad ones too the way I look at that is the "bad stories" are the ones that involve those parties who we definitely need to reach to educate. Education and awareness and openness....KEY!

I got so tired of being sick and tired....and tired of being angry (whew.....that anger road is not a fun one...and it creeps up unexpectedly still)...tired of "fighting"...I don't want to fight...I don't want anyone to pity me! I've pitied myself too much already. I want to work towards change and work towards changing everyone's view on this.

You all know as well as I do that most view us as angry, ungrateful, lacking compassion, lacking thankfulness, etc, etc, etc....too many times we're viewed as negative and it's our own faults! Regardless of why we got that way, WE are responsible for 100% of the image we portray. No one will change that for us, we have to change it ourselves. Turn the spotlight to viewing us as positive, grateful, loving compassionate, etc, etc, etc...WE all know we are those traits, but it's not how we're perceived and thus we create the trend...we create the behavior. You teach people how to treat you. It's painful to realize that but it's the truth!

I know I'm surely preachin to the choir here but it's just flow of consciousness.

What IF we could change the perception? What IF we could be looked upon with compassion? Wouldn't that be awesome? I think so!

I believe if we change the behavior, we change the outcome.

This is our birthright! And we're "allowing" others to determine whether we can have it or not! Yes, I said WE ARE ALLOWING IT! Take the responsibility! We can open these records IF that is what we want! It's what I want and what I will do!